written circa 2010
aphasia: (n) loss of ability to understand or express speech.
words stream into my head at awkward angles and incomplete sentences. syllables bunch and smooch together as the rain pours down on my windshield, too blinding for sounds to carry much meaning.
my nerves have fault lines running through them because i shake when i try to talk.
i get tied down in semantics and morphemes, consonants and vowels weaving bright white hot lines into my brain. words sear into my flesh like burning wax. they mark me until i am no longer my own.
logograms sputter around, bouncing off the walls in my head, stuck there for eternity because i can’t say them properly. my tongue turns inward and i swallow it down into my stomach.
i bleed words from imaginary ulcers and i spread my arms out crooked to represent letters of the alphabet that i can’t pronounce. i’ve ripped my vocal chords through my throat leaving a gaping whole so the words might fly out. but they just bite back and i spills letters like crimson down my skin.
i am no writer. syllables and rhyme possess me, used me to spill themselves over the pavement and onto any ground to form paragraphs.